Damn thee Arm & Hammer! Damn you all to hell! That goes for the rest of you as well, you Crests and Aquafreshes.
As I'm prepping my toothbrush for the nightly brushing, I squeeze the tube ever so slightly just to get the toothpaste on the stinking brush. Oh how careless I must have been! I manage to find the air bubble in every tube of toothpaste I've ever used. I don't know why it's there and why it isn't REMOVED before sent away to the consumers, but I hit that air pocket and lose a perfectly good bit of toothpaste to the oasis that is the bathroom sink. Shot off like a cannon. Maybe I should have held the toothbrush more in the line of fire, but then it just wouldn't lay right. Another wasted brush-worth of toothpaste, another night ruined.
Why me, Lord, why me?