A surprisingly comparable matchup
Granted, I was tired when this came to me, but the similarities were eerie, and wouldn't you know it, I hate my ex-girlfriend too. (There are some parts that don't parallel each other, but work with me)
So I start going out with my girlfriend, and I think she's the best thing since sliced bread. President Bush, well my parents sure weren't thrilled with him so that rubbed off on me, but he hadn't done anything terrible...yet.
Slowly, I notice some blemishes on her previously spotless persona, but I shrugged them off because I thought she was so perfect. President Bush: he can't talk very well at all and he holds the least amount of press conferences out of any other President before, but oh well.
My ex makes it onto two varsity teams her freshman year. I'm really proud of her but I'm worried that I won't be good enough for her and I start to wish that I could be as good as her. (Fuzzy reference) President Bush: 9/11 happens and there's no doubt we should retaliate and go into AFGHANISTAN to find Osama Bin Laden. Damn it, he did something right and everyone likes him.
Christmas rolls around, and about three relationships around us ended and we were really close (too bad it didn't happen, huh?). I was really starting to question whether she was the one I wanted to be with. President Bush: Iraq?!? WHAT?!? We didn't even get Bin Laden and you're going into Iraq! What's going to come of this?
Throughout our whole relationship, I was afraid to look at any other girls or even mention that I thought another girl (even celebrities) were really sexy or hot. I never really had good "job security". President Bush: Terror Alert System. Crank that bad boy up just to keep the American public on edge, but nothing ever comes of the threats so the administration must be doing a good job deterring the terrorists, right? Questions are for terrorists.
After we broke up, several of my friends told me "I couldn't stand being around you when you were with her" or "I tried to tell you what she was doing, but you just shrugged it off and didn't listen to me". This has a couple parallels. President Bush: Diplomacy is a very honorable trait as a leader in the world community, but we have the support of England, and don't forget Poland. He sure hasn't made any friends during his presidency, and Democrats have been trying to show Republicans what he's doing to our country, but they follow him without question.
Word came around to me that my ex was thinking about ditching me for another guy, and they always flirted around. Whenever I brought it up, though, she told me I wasn't being fair because she couldn't have other male friends. President Bush: "Mission Accomplished". Try "Unaccomplished".
Now (finally, it's almost over) she's part of another group. She's only with her boyfriend now so she can be popular and she's probably getting plugged every weekend by that tit she's dating. I don't want her back though, she just glares at me and everyone I've talked to says she's a real bitch all the time. I can say I would feel no remorse for any misfortune (short of death) that comes her way. In hindsight, she lied to me probably 80% of the time and I was too stupid to realize it. President Bush: There's no parallel, I just wanted everyone to know how much I really hate her.